Skip to main content

Beauty in the Valleys: Unpacking Pain in the Puzzle

      I like pain, but I don't handle it very well. Yes, you did in fact read that correctly. Continuing with that thought-- it might be more appropriate to instead state that I appreciate pain.



     Our lives are a culmination of mountain top highs, and deep valley lows. There are times within the valley when it seems unfathomable to reach the mountaintop-- despite having perhaps been there many times before. The rain arrives quickly, leaving no room for preparation, and the storms that accompany take no mercy on the small pieces of dignity you thought remained. These storms take people and bring out the "ugly," yes; but I want you to stop and reframe this for a moment because those very same storms are so vital to the people we are, and continually becoming.
     We become a perception of "ugly" in the dark trials of our lives because pain is a difficult burden to carry. We fail to show others and yes-- even ourselves compassion when the world is crashing in, and instead-- we lash out to make up for the ways in which we are "falling short," when in reality-- it is called being human.

     The valleys of life are essential.

     The mountaintop picturesque view is stellar. This overarching, glorious view grants us the ability to zoom out and seek clarity in our lives, and perhaps the lives of those around us. The mountaintop peaks are generally peaceful and free of distraction-- allowing us to take necessary moments to reflect, breathe, and be present. However, the thing about the mountain is: How would we ever live life if we spent it only living on the mountaintop?

    The mountaintop is wonderful, yes-- but living in an artificial bubble, zoomed out from the rest of the world isn't a calling for any of us. We can try to remain there, but eventually-- we will need to come down. The valleys have moments of chaos, and places where it would be easier to quit, or live from a distance-- I understand, and feel the same way myself all too often. But when we look out from the mountaintop-- we look into the valley and appreciate its' beauty. What we forget in that process however is all the pressure and trials undergone within the valley to achieve its' beauty. No beautiful thing is perfect.

    The valley's pain is beauty. Our own beauty is often reflected in hidden tears, lies, or ugly words that are later remedied. Our beauty is messy, and often takes the form of unspoken pasts-- even in those of us who actively write and try so hard to stay in the present. Our valleys are zooming in on the mountain we have come to so love and appreciate, and it says that we are beautiful precisely because of our pain we try so desperately to erase.

    Take time to love the view from the mountaintop, but don't be afraid to be still in the valley, these are the close-ups to your longshot portrait, and a piece of your incredible story too.
   

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Blessings in Disguise

     I was drowning under the weight of my own thoughts. Those who have ever felt the burden of their mind as it takes off beneath their body, and chains them to their worst nightmare from which they feel they will never escape may understand exactly the intruding emotions that inhabit the space I must live- known as my mind. To be gasping for air, and unable to draw in the breath essential to life. To look around trying so hard to find the break in the storm clouds, and only seeing the bundles of dismal gray without a glimmer of sun.       I never thought I would say it, but having to take medical leave this semester might be one of the best things that has happened to me. Initially, I was angry, hurting, cold, and lonely.. but lonely because I had become not only physically malnourished, but spiritually. It was never that I had doubted God existed, or he had a plan.. but I know I put it on the backburner- and I did certainly feel as thoug...
Post a Comment
Read more

Open Letter to The Girl Who Wishes She Had an Eating Disorder

     To the girl who wishes she had an eating disorder:  Oh, words. There are so many things I would like to tell you in this moment, but all too quickly the time passes. My heart shatters in watching your eyes grow dark in the pain, as I watch you belittle yourself, and absorb the pointed and loaded remarks of society. I am sorry that society has made you feel so inadequate that you have the overwhelming urge to turn against yourself in your quest to find peace and self satisfaction. The satisfaction that society will never give you, and I guarantee you will never get.      I am sorry that society has told you your worth in life is based off your size, or how many calories you can deprive yourself, rather than the overflowing compassion that flows from your soul, or the beauty of your free and passionate fiery spirit. I am sorry that society has become the fragile layers of ice upon which we traverse, when they offer no support, and we s...
Post a Comment
Read more

I Said "I Do"

     One year ago today I said I do . Damn --  I really didn't know what I was getting myself into, did I??      No- I didn't get married, nor did I say yes to the dress, or get engaged to the man of my dreams (although if someone figures out when those can happen, can you let me know? Thanks!) I said I do, but I definitely had no idea what this past year would entail as I flipped through and spent two hours initialing my life away, or telling my story, or crying a river to a few complete and utter strangers who I had entrusted with my care, and chosen over my professors, and college.     I sure as hell wanted out of it by 6pm that first night as I sat down to dinner. As I peered at the Mount Everest of food that had been laid before my eyes, and I said to them, "Oh there is no f******* way I can eat all of that" cue the tears, the panic attack, you name it... I probably did it. I was ready to run. I think of those funny...
Post a Comment
Read more